New year resolutions

It was about four years ago that I resolved to not have any new year resolutions. Mostly because I was doing it because ...well... I didn't know any better (wow, two becauses in a sentence. That's a new low even for me). Every new year, I'd think of a really bizarre list (i WILL lose weight. i WILL not bitch. i WILL not buy shoes endlessly. i WILL learn to like Tom Cruise. You get the picture.) and by February, I'd be looking at my phone notes or diary or asking my mum, "Er, exactly what did I resolve to do?" That is, if I wasn't already reminded of one of my resolutions when I bit into a truffle or smoked the odd cigarette.

And then till March, I'd be all head-nods and determination. Soon April would bring its heat and I'd forget all about everything I'd decided to do or not. I'd say to myself, "S, you're four months into the year already and not doing anything you decided. It's already ending, this year is, so there's no point in your sticking to anything. So go lose your temper for a change." Or something like that. I am pretty persuasive when I try, as you can see.

Last year I felt the faintest stirrings of wanting to make resolutions. But the call wasn't loud enough. This year, however, the call is loud and clear. The need for a resolution has presented itself, it feels like the thought has crystallised into one big compulsion and now I can't but follow.

Incidentally, for those few of you who have felt the same call, check this out. It's a little long, it's a little yawn, but it explains what I've been trying to understand about failed resolutions and miniscule willpower in general.

This year's resolution is an old one. Stick to my resolutions. I am not very different from half the planet when it comes to resolutions. Top of my list is, of course, to lose weight. I've gone along with this battle (not fought, mind you) for long enough and now with two kids, I seriously think it's time my body looked like someone whose hips have never borne children. Some others are.

February Anger management: Work on my temper. If I can't work on it alone, get help.

March Equestrianism: Get off my high horse. Consciously catch myself when I look down on things. Accents, news presenters, Chetan Bhagat, bad english, synthetic wearing fashionistas and those who use their fingers to put things in quotation marks, among others.

April Skinflinting in spring: Start putting money away. (Do not laugh.)

June Wordwise: Read more. Read better

If these are met by half the year, then I'll create new ones while continuing the existing.

Meanwhile, let me see if I can get that doughnut I am craving for after all this talk of will.